It seems I owe you an apology -- I don't hate you, house. You have a lot of fabulous qualities and it's been brought to my attention that I've been a little harsh when writing about you. For that, I am truly very sorry; so please don't slam a window on my fingertips or lock me outside in my underwear as revenge for my mean-spirited words... you're such a good little house.
You're in a nice, quiet neighborhood with big old trees (never you mind about the Russian Olive next door -- that's not your fault at all, hon). You've had some fabulous work done upstairs, too -- you've been nipped and tucked into a fabulous new version of yourself (don't get me wrong -- I'm sure you were always fabulous... but a little lift here and there never hurt a girl, right?)
So please accept my sincerest apologies if I hurt you in the slightest. I think the heat and allergies just overwhelmed me a bit, but I'm in a much better place now with allergy meds in my system. In the future, I will definitely work to keep your feelings in mind.
Yours in lease,
P.S. Thanks for keeping it cooler while my in-laws were visiting -- you deserve something cute as a reward... we'll go shopping later, okay?